Approval
by mormonlover
Summary: Kevin's most recent hell dream leads the two boys to question their morals.


Kevin was walking around the Magic Kingdom by himself. Connor had wandered off, but this was of no real concern to Kevin; he assumed he was using the bathroom or visiting a souvenir shop. As Kevin walked, he found himself having to stop in front of Cinderella's castle. It really was a magnificent sight, and it still filled Kevin's brown eyes with tears every time he saw it.

As he stood there in awe of the castle, a strange figure approached him from behind and tapped him on the shoulder. Kevin turned around to see a familiar face. It was Mickey Mouse. Kevin was fully aware that the characters in the park were fake, but the nine-year-old boy inside of him chose to believe he was real. "Hi, Mickey!" Kevin greeted cheerfully. "What brings you here?"

It was then that Kevin witnessed something surprisingly horrifying. The expression on the mascot's face changed. It went from being cheerful and welcoming to a horrific expression that appeared to be a cross between a scowl and smirk. To make things worse, his mouth began to sprout teeth, sharp ones with blood on the tips. Kevin turned pale and, in a state of disbelief, stumbled backwards.

"M-M-Mickey?" Kevin choked out. "Are… what's happening?"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU FUCKING FAGGOT."

Kevin flinched backwards more. His knees gave out and he fell to the ground, staring up at the now malicious mouse standing above him.

"What did you say?" he screamed out.

"WE DON'T NEED YOUR FUCKING QUEER ASS KIND HERE. YOU LIVE A LIFE OF SIN AND DO NOT DESERVE ME OR ANY SORT OF HAPPINESS."

As Mickey spoke, Kevin noticed a familiar image. Flames. Flames were slowly growing from the ground around Mickey's feet, and all around the entire park for that matter. It was then that Kevin knew exactly where he really was.

"Where's… where's Connor?"

The mouse did not respond. Instead, he pointed to the castle. Shaking uncontrollably, Kevin slowly turned his head. From the highest point of the castle, Kevin witnessed perhaps the most frightening image he ever laid eyes on. Connor, the love of his life, was hanging from the tower by his neck, his skin a disgusting green color. In his hands he clutched a sign that said, "ALL FAGS GO TO HELL."

"COOOOONOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRR!"

Kevin was no longer at the hellish Disney World anymore. Instead, he was back in his Orlando hotel room, sweat pouring from every part of his body. He looked around the room and looked at the empty spot next to him in the bed. Connor wasn't there.

"Oh my God, it really happened!" It was then that the delusional Kevin let out a horrific scream, which led right into a fit of hysterical crying. The bathroom door flung open. Connor was standing in the doorway, a toothbrush hanging from his mouth.

"Kevin?" Connor frantically called, removing the brush from his mouth. "Oh my God, Kevin!" Connor dashed to the bed and flung his arms around his sobbing boyfriend.

"Connor! OH MY GOD, CONNOR!" Kevin wrapped his arms around Connor's waist, squeezing him for dear life.

"Kevin, what's the matter? You're scaring me."

Kevin tried hard to respond, but he was too hysterical to utter an intelligible word.

"I…. I had… I had one," Kevin managed to choke out.

"Had what?" Connor was growing more and more concerned the harder Kevin cried.

"The… the… dream."

"…the hell dream?"

Kevin frantically nodded his head. Hell dreams were common among young Mormons. It was believed to be God's way of punishing those that have done wrong or have had unholy thoughts. Kevin and Connor had both broken away from the Mormon faith after returning from Uganda, and the hell dreams had become less and less frequent until they stopped altogether. Connor was concerned as to why Kevin had one out of nowhere. Still, his main concern was to calm down his boyfriend.

"Kevin, it was just a dream. It couldn't have been that bad." As he spoke, he began to slowly rock Kevin, rubbing gently on his back. Still, Kevin could not compose himself.

"You were dead."

Connor turned white. "I was… what?"

"Dead," Kevin whimpered. "You were… hanging on a noose."

"Do you know why?"

"It was because we're gay."

This was a conversation that Connor was hoping that he never had to have with Kevin. Sure, when the two missionaries started to show a fair deal of affection from each other in Uganda, they did have to question if what they were doing would look favorable in the eyes of God, but the two boys thought they had learned to look past that and only care about how in love they were.

"Kevin, please stop crying," Connor wanted to avoid the subject of the dream.

"Connor, I love you so much."

"I love you too, darling. Please try and calm down."

"Connor… I don't think I could live without you. That was… that was…" Kevin tried to finish, but the image of Connor's corpse flashed across his mind, refreshing Kevin's hysterical crying.

"Kevin… please… you're making me cry too." Sure enough, Connor's eyes were filling with tears. They sat there on the bed for quite some time, Kevin sobbing as tears began streaming down Connor's face. Connor had never seen Kevin actually cry before. The sight was more horrific to him than any hell dream he had ever had.

"Ok, Kevin," Connor said, wiping the tears from his face. "You're covered in sweat. I'm gonna run a nice warm bath for you. Would you like that?"

Finally, Kevin calmed down a little. Only lightly sobbing at this point, Kevin gave what Connor interpreted to be a very weak smile. "You're the best," Kevin whimpered. Connor smiled and took Kevin by the hand, leading him to the bathroom.

"Take off your clothes and I'll run the water," Connor said, kneeling beside the bathtub, turning on the water. When he turned around, Kevin had completely stripped down. It was a sight that normally would have turned Connor on immensely, but this was obviously not the appropriate time. Connor helped Kevin into the warm water. Kevin sat there, clutching his knees to his chest, as Connor washed his back with a warm washcloth.

"Feel good, hon?" Connor asked. Finally, Kevin looked at Connor and gave him a genuine smile. Tears were still streaming down his face, but Connor could tell that Kevin was finally relaxing.

"Must have been one hell of a dream," Connor tried to smirk.

Kevin was silent, only able to nod his head.

"Well," Connor continued, lightly pouring water over Kevin's head. "Sometimes you get the dreams for no particular reason. It just… happens."

"But… I think this was for being gay."

"Oh… right." Connor was hoping the topic wouldn't come up again. They sat there silent for a few minutes.

"Does this make us bad people?" Kevin finally asked.

Normally, Connor would have been offended by such a question, but the severity of the dream had him thinking about it a little bit.

"You mean… maybe this is God's way of telling us this is wrong?"

"I don't know… maybe?"

The last thing Connor wanted was to have this conversation. The two boys sat there, squirming from the awkward and deafening silence.

"Kevin… are you trying to tell me you don't love me anymore?"

Kevin shot up from the water. "No! Oh God, no. That's not it at all. I am more in love with you every day we're together. I'm just saying… I don't know, I wish we had God's approval. And I mean… if I don't get it, I don't even care. It'd just… be nice. You know?"

Connor gave a weak smile. "I understand." Kevin sat back down in the water and allowed Connor to finish washing him. After he finished, he dried off and put on a fresh pair of pajamas.

"It's pretty late," Connor said. "Should we try to go back to bed?"

"In a little bit," Kevin said, heading over to the couch. "Mind if I pop in a movie?"

"Oh, of course not!" Connor said, joining Kevin on the couch. Kevin put _Beauty and the Beast _into the DVD player. It was one of his favorites. As the movie began, Kevin wrapped his arm around Connor and drew him close. Connor takes the opportunity to do something he hadn't done in quite some time: pray.

_Heavenly father_, Connor thought. _I'm sorry it's been quite some time since we've talked, but I need a favor_. _I love Kevin Price more than anything in the world, and all I want is spend the rest of my life with him. But we both feel that… it's not right unless we can have your blessing. So please, I ask… no, I BEG of you… give me a sign that this is ok. Amen. _Connor looked at Kevin, who in turn looked at Connor and smiled warmly. Connor hoped his prayer could be answered, but he knew the chances of that happening were slim. Just then, Connor's cell phone rang.

It was fairly late at night, so Connor couldn't begin to imagine who was calling him. He looked at his phone, recognizing the number instantly. He had deleted the contact after their ugly falling out, but he'd never forget the number anywhere. Cautiously, he answered the phone. "…Dad?"

It was Connor's father, a well-respected member of their local church and also a favorite for candidacy to be the local senator. When Connor finally got tired of "turning it off," his dad was the first person he came out to. As Connor expected, the end result was not so glamorous, and the two haven't talked in over a year. Connor was disowned from the Church of Latter-Day Saints as well as the family.

"Connor." Mr. McKinley's voice was low and even, with a very faint cracking sound. It sounded almost as if he had been crying.

"It's late." Connor couldn't even begin to think of how to start a conversation.

"Yeah, sorry about that." They sat there through awkward silence. To Connor, it felt like an eternity. Finally, Mr. McKinley spoke again. "It's good to hear your voice again."

Connor's heart jumped a little. It was so strange to hear his father talk to him, let alone be slightly affectionate. "Why are you speaking to me?" Connor said, addressing the elephant in the room, so to speak.

"Your mother and I were cleaning out your room." After being thrown out of the house, Connor's parents had sent him all of his things. He was surprised there were still things left. "I came across one of your old photo albums in the back of the closet. God, you were such a cute kid." Connor heard his father chuckle warmly. The sound sent a delightful pang to the pit of his stomach.

"I was, wasn't I?" Connor smirked.

"It had me thinking," Mr. McKinley continued. "You know, I don't approve of the lifestyle you've chosen for yourself."

Connor groaned, "It's not a choice, but ok."

"Right. Well, anyway, I looked at these pictures and I looked at those beautiful, blue eyes and that adorable auburn hair and I just broke down. I just… I guess what I'm trying to say is that I miss you. A lot."

Connor's eyes filled with tears. "I miss you too, Dad."

"While I can't say I'm thrilled about the idea of having a GAY son, I'm still proud to say that I have one. One that was always a great kid, said his prayers, got straight A's in school, and served a mission in Uganda. You're just an all around good person. Why should being gay change that? Do you feel like a bad person for being gay, son?"

Connor thought back to the events that had occurred earlier in the bathroom, looking over at Kevin on the couch. He smiled. "No, Dad. I don't. And I'm glad you don't either."

"Right." Mr. McKinley continued. "I'm going to have to take some time to get used to the kind of person you are, but until then, I'm just going to focus on the positives. And I promise, one day I'll be perfectly ok with it. We'll take it one day at a time. So when you get the chance, your mother and I would love for us all to have dinner."

A single tear fell down Connor's face. He was beaming. "Yeah, of course!"

"Bring Kevin with you. You two are still together, right?"

Connor was shocked his dad even remembered. He chuckled. "Yeah, I am."

"I'd love to get to know him. Any plans on marrying?"

At this, Connor practically dropped the phone. "Well… well… we haven't talked about that really."

"Oh, I see. Well, if and when you do… I'll give you away. If you'd let me."

Connor began sobbing joyous tears. "Yes, I'd love that."

"Ok, son. Sorry I called so late. Get some sleep, ok?"

"Yeah, Dad."

"I love you, you know."

"Me too, Dad. Bye."

Connor hung up the phone, tears still streaming down his face. He looked up at the ceiling and smiled. It looked as if he had gotten the answer to his prayers he had been looking for. Kevin walked over to him, placing a hand gently on his shoulder.

"Connor, what did he say? Is everything ok?"

Connor didn't speak. Instead, he whirled around, drawing Kevin in for a long, passionate kiss. He broke away. "Do me a favor? Go to the bathroom and get me a glass of water?"

Kevin looked slightly perplexed, but smiled anyway. "Sure, hon. Be right back." He went to the bathroom, filled a glass with water, and walked back into the bedroom. Kevin stopped abruptly at what he saw, dropping the glass on the ground. Connor was down on one knee.

"Connor…?"

"Kevin Price, all my prayers have been answered. I used to ask God every day to make something incredible happen in my life, and then I met you. If I were to ever lose you, I don't think I could possibly live anymore. I love you more than anything else in the whole world."

Kevin was giggling like a schoolgirl. "You're rambling, sweetie."

Connor blushed. "Sorry. I guess what I'm trying to say is… will you be my husband?"

Connor pulled out a small box he had stashed away in his pocket while Kevin was in the other room. He opened the box to reveal a silver band with a giant diamond in the middle. Kevin broke down.

"It's… beautiful. And the diamond is… is…"

"Shaped like Mickey," Connor said, smiling. "So… Kevin Price… will you marry me?"

"Yes. Oh God, yes, Connor." Connor slipped the ring on Kevin's finger, as Kevin dragged Connor up from the ground, bringing him into a tight embrace. They stood there for a long time, neither one ever wanting to let go.

"I love you so much," Connor said.

"I love you more," Kevin said.

The two boys continued to hold each other tight. The people next door were watching _Cinderella_. Kevin recognized it well. Eventually, the two boys began to sway to the music, almost as if they were waltzing. Connor leaned in close, softly singing into Kevin's ear.

"No matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing, the dream that you wish will come true"


End file.
